How Do I Get A Date With the Hot Waitress?
July 28th, 2008 by Andy
Today I went for lunch at a large chain restaurant. Very quickly I was greeted and seated, and soon my waitress appeared. Physically she met my definition of a perfect 10 and I wanted very badly to talk to her. She attempted to flirt a little bit, but I quickly came to the conclusion that she was just as anxious as me.
Now I know you’re probably thinking that this was partly due to the fact that I was anxious, and you’d be right. More than once I caught myself visibly showing my anxiety by tapping my feet, putting my hands in my pockets, or folding my arms across my chest. I kept asking myself why social anxiety was flaring up so bad in this situation. Why didn’t I know what to say to her?
As I left I continued to analyze this situation and came to a realization. Other than the fact that she was anxious as well, and that she was a waitress, there there wasn’t too much that I could tell about her. I could have opened her with a question about her day, or by commenting on the weather, but she hears that stuff all day long, and I have pretty much programmed those conversations out of my head. So how could I open a conversation with her? How could I have learned more about her in this situation?
Finally it hit me. I could extend the concept of peacocking to restaurants in a subtly geeky way. For those that don’t know, peacocking is a pick-up term referring to wearing something odd that will draw the attention of women and inspire questions from them. So why not do the same in a restaurant? Obviously what would work in a club or bar isn’t going to work here though, so we need something a bit more subtle.
So I have my new approach to restaurants. From now on, when I go to a restaurant alone I will bring either a book or a notebook with me. If I bring a book it will be something at least slightly controversial and question inspiring. I may bring a book on hypnosis for example. If I bring a notebook, I’ll sit there writing about something that would make for an interesting conversation such as an article for here. Something that would lead instantly into us getting to know each other. In either case, the whole idea is to get to know each other better, so make it something connected to you.
As I said, I was just inspired to try this today, so I haven’t tested it yet. I will be soon and perhaps I will write about my experiences with it. One other thing you may want to try is acting more interested in your book or writing. When she comes to the table ask her to wait a second while you finish the sentence you’re on. Perhaps this will generate more interest.
Update: After some feedback from some friends on this issue, it’s clear that there are a few things that I shouldn’t have assumed are obvious. I would never advocate harassing waitresses. The whole point of this is to converse with another person and at the vary least make her day a little brighter. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCE is it ok to harass waitresses, nor anyone else to get a date.
For those of you who thought this is what I intended, take time to read the article. I think you will see that my intent is to teach other men to be more honest about who they are, and to converse better with women. This is about doing away with the stereotypical pickup lines that are way too overused, and helping people learn to be more interesting.
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July 29th, 2008 at 9:06 pm
Oh, do I have the book for you that will spark conversation! I am currently reviewing a book by Steve Santagati entitled The Manual: A true bad boy explains how men think, date, and mate - and what women can do to come out on top. If that doesn’t grab a woman’s attention, I don’t know what will! *grin*
Oh, and Chapter 25, talks about the art of flirting. You might want to check it out *winK*