Comments on: What Women Want in a Man

By: Andy

Andy — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 14:51:53 +0000

I think you’re test is good for one category of low self esteem (LSE) girls, but I have witnessed a second category. These are LSE girls that seek validation in the form of gifts. Instead of rejecting gifts, these girls need the gifts to fill their self esteem holes. They are also very easy to spot though. They cling like saran wrap.

By: Kim

Kim — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 21:18:41 +0000

Here’s the God’s honest truth – the lower a woman’s self-esteem, the more likely she is to be attracted to “bad boys” who will abuse her and make her life miserable. The higher a woman’s self-esteem, the more she’ll be attracted to confident leaders. Both types (and men, for that matter) will be turned off by needy, insecure behavior.

Need to know which type you’re dealing with? Here’s the acid test: Can she accept good things from you? If she can, she has high-self-esteem; she believes she’s worthy of being treated well, so when you DO treat her well, it makes her happy and there’s no inner conflict. If, on the other hand, you treat her well and her attraction towards you PLUMMETS, or she gets uncomfortable and tries to create massive drama to ruin it, she’s low-self-esteem. Girls like this believe that they’re not worthy of being treated well, so when you do it, it creates massive inner conflict.

If you want to have a happy life, ONLY get into relationships with high-self-esteem girls.

Love, Kim
Kim´s last blog ..How To Demolish Fear

By: Andy

Andy — Tue, 30 Dec 2008 13:31:39 +0000

That makes perfect sense Devyl,

I don’t agree that the need to “fix” things or “rescue” is necessarily linked to neediness though. I think these are a result of our culture. As men we’re raised to believe that we’re supposed to be knights in shining armor ready to ride up and save our damsel in distress at a moments notice. Many are still raised in homes where the men are expected to be the fixers around the house and this sticks with us throughout life.

Personally, I have a horrible time with this. I’ve been “fixing” everything in sight for years whether it was a radio, computer, car, or my girlfriend. In fact that was partly to blame for my divorce since I never just listened.

By: Devyl

Devyl — Tue, 30 Dec 2008 06:30:59 +0000

I find myself attracted to the sweet guys because I like to be “pampered” in simple ways – massage, hand-holding, cuddling, flowers, sweet notes …

I find myself attracted to confidence because I do not like neediness. I do not like the “assholes” or “bad asses” or “bad boys” though. I am smart enough, as a woman, to tell the difference.

Now if I could find a sweet guy that didn’t get all needy on me, I would be happy indeed. I’m great at bolstering one’s confidence … I just do not want to be depended upon to do so … I want my man to stand on his own two feet, without feeling like he needs to “fix” things I am upset about or “rescue” me when I am in over my head.

Make sense?

Devyls last blog post..Baby S update (

By: gcgal

gcgal — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 17:46:55 +0000

I have to say I agree with your post, women are definitely attracted to confidence and you’ve explained this well!

gcgals last blog post..Fun Monday – a day in the life

By: Andy

Andy — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 20:19:06 +0000

Keli,

I’m glad to hear that you managed to find your way though that! So many don’t.

By: Keli

Keli — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 20:06:05 +0000

I think you have hit the proverbial nail on it’s proverbial noggin!
I was asshole blindness impaired through my teens and early 20’s…thank goodness I learned how to look past that “confidence” and found a heck of a good guy to spend my life with!

By: Adam

Adam — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 19:50:22 +0000

Yes, confidence is certainly almost an aphrodisiac in the early stages of a relationship. Adams last blog post..SEO Tip: Video Optimization